Archive for ‘Uncategorized’

December 9th, 2011

Desperation and Trust: a Psalm for the weak

I’m writing this from a weak place.

The Lord has been very good to us. All my needs are met. There is so much to be thankful for and I am undeserving of the blessings that are all around me.

Yet, I am struggling. Reaching and grasping for contentment and trust in the Lord.

This morning I woke to read an e-mail stating that the home we are attempting to purchase is slipping out of our grasps. The appraisal came back with an acceptable value, but “subject to repairs”. That line, “subject to repairs” is what is keeping the lending bank from giving us the loan; and it is that decision that is making this gorgeous, sunny December day so painful.

Moments after reading this, I opened my Bible and read these words:

You are my King and my God. You command victories for Israel. Only by your power can we push back our enemies; only in your name can we trample our foes. I do not trust in my bow; I do not count on my sword to save me. You are the one who gives us victory over our enemies… O God, we give glory to you all day long and constantly praise your name.” Psalm 44:4-8

This Psalm is heart-wrenching and strangely familiar today. So with nowhere to turn and no answers, I confess my weakness and present this situation with this claimed truth: There will be no victory unless the Lord provides.

“Lord I trust You alone. You are my strength and a mighty mountain which I hide within. You protect me out of the goodness of your heart and not because I am worthy of it in any way. You desire me and I bask in your love. Father of heaven and earth, in utter and complete surrender, I come to Your throne-room asking for You to do what only You can do. Come. Change my heart. Move a mountain. It’s my desire that we would have this house, but Your will be done.”

August 10th, 2011

Blind Bartemeus

This morning I was hit by a passage from Mark 10:46-52.

46 Then they reached Jericho, and as Jesus and his disciples left town, a large crowd followed him. A blind beggar named Bartimaeus (son of Timaeus) was sitting beside the road. 47 When Bartimaeus heard that Jesus of Nazareth was nearby, he began to shout, “Jesus, Son of David, have mercy on me!”
48 “Be quiet!” many of the people yelled at him.

But he only shouted louder, “Son of David, have mercy on me!”

49 When Jesus heard him, he stopped and said, “Tell him to come here.”

So they called the blind man. “Cheer up,” they said. “Come on, he’s calling you!” 50 Bartimaeus threw aside his coat, jumped up, and came to Jesus.

51 “What do you want me to do for you?” Jesus asked.

“My rabbi,” the blind man said, “I want to see!”

52 And Jesus said to him, “Go, for your faith has healed you.” Instantly the man could see, and he followed Jesus down the road.

Stories like these are strung throughout the new testament (everything after Micah) and I’ve read them countless times with very little impact. Today, though, it really stuck out to me that there was such faith, honesty and eagerness in blind Bartemeus. I love that when reprimanded, he only shouted louder. I love that he threw aside his coat, which I can assume would be an important piece of clothing that you wouldn’t want to misplace or have stolen if you were a blind man. I love that when asked, he was simple and honest to Jesus — not muddying his request by trying to impress Him. I love that Bartemeus was immediately healed.

I don’t have much to share that is mind-blowing, but I encourage you to sit with this passage and be in that town that day, on that road, watching this story take place. Let Christ heal you, or maybe heal your faith. Ask Jesus simply and honestly, “give me faith like Bartemeus.”

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March 4th, 2011

A Healthy Desperation

If a man have only correct doctrine to offer me I am sure to slip out at the first intermission to seek the company of someone who has seen‎ for himself how lovely is the face of Him who is the Rose of Sharon and the Lily of the Valleys. Such a man can help me, and no one else can.

A.W. Tozer, The Divine Conquest

I am increasingly solidifying my conviction that there is a desperate and profound need to be filled with the Spirit and to know the Lord with absolute sincerity and truth. Our heartbeat and bare existence is rather meaningless and false if we do not know our maker. Very little worth at all.

Knowing about Him is of fleeting value as well, for many have come and gone that could recite volumes of information, but have not known Him as savior, lover, servant and King. If I lead worship or receive teaching that is not inspired by the Holy Spirit, I am as a man beating the air.

Seek Him today. Simply. Sincerely.